One of my top strengths, as identified by Gallup’s CliftonStrengths assessment, is Adaptability. Adaptability is a talent theme that is all about being present in the moment, embracing spontaneity, staying calm in a crisis and shifts priorities to meet the needs of valued relationships. Like all talents, there is a ‘dark side’ or ‘shadow trait’ too. The shadow traits are reactivity, a dislike for long-term goal setting, putting the needs of others before your own and a lack of discipline. These shadow traits, if not managed, can become weaknesses preventing me from succeeding.

An example of how I work hard to manage the shadow traits of Adaptability is through my dedication and practice of juggling. I have been juggling for 25 years in total with varying commitment levels over the years. For the past few years, I have made a strong commitment to mastery through having the discipline to practice daily – even if it’s just for 5mins a day. By fulfilling this commitment my long term goal of improving my ability to focus, co-ordination, mental sharpness, physical dexterity and of course, the satisfaction of mastering a complex skill.

Having stuck with this daily commitment to my practice for over two years now, I can feel how by managing my weaknesses, my talent theme of adaptability enhances my experience. I’m able to be fully present in the moment while I improvise moving from one pattern to the next. I experience ‘flow’ readily and almost on command due to the highly focussed state required to keep all of the balls in the air, moving rhythmically, sequentially but with ease. I also get to experience the spontaneity of trying new patterns, experimenting with techniques not tried before, inventing whole new patterns that I can then master before I teach them.

While many lessons have come from my observations of watching others learn, teaching others, coaching others and learning for myself, there is one that I want to share that may be useful to you.

Learning to focus

When we first learn how to juggle, we start by throwing the ball from one hand to the other aiming to get a consistent looping throw that flows from one hand to the other in an infinity like pattern. See fig 1. 

 Most people can do this task easily with just one ball, but their focus is usually on the catching of the ball. While this strategy is effective when juggling one ball, it’s reactive and does not require consistency in order to be successful. Adding just one ball completely overwhelms somebody relying on this strategy because their brain is so focussed on ensuring each hand catches the ball. Even when somebody manages to juggle two balls using this strategy, they are tense, fatigue quickly and the pattern lacks flow. Add a third or fourth ball, and very quickly the catching strategy is obviously not sustainable.

An alternative strategy requires consistency of throw, and a trust that if you get the throw right, the catch will take care of itself. What comes with the adoption of this strategy is repeated failure through dropping the ball, and a willingness to stay focussed on the throw despite the temptation to ‘follow’ the catch. Most people find this strategy demoralising and incredibly difficult to adjust to. However, through discipline and a bit of hard work, this shift in focus enables people to quickly master two and three ball juggling. With some more hard work, the same principle serves as a foundation to master four, five or more ball juggling.

Application to other areas of life

While this key pattern of learning works for juggling, I’ve been applying it to other areas of my life with great success too. For example, in my work coaching managers and leaders, I first listen to where they are focussing their attention. If the discussion is largely focussed on what isn’t working, problems with individuals in the team or a broader challenge with the team’s dynamics, they are usually taking a more reactive approach to leadership. They might say things like “I’m trying to focus on moving the team forward but the team isn’t stepping up to the plate. It’s like I have to become a micromanager to ensure that things get done properly.” Similarly, when I’m listening to my kids sharing their experience at school my ears prick up when I hear them say things like “My maths teacher hates me….that’s why I got a bad mark in my exam”. Knowing that they don’t particularly like maths and that they need to work hard to achieve results I ask them “Have you completed all of your allocated homework this term?” to which I get a non-committal “yes…..I’ve done all my homework” which is shortly followed by them retreating to their room to do some homework. Another example can be seen in combat sports when you see a fighter at the top of their game start to get complacent. They don’t train as hard leading up to the fight to defend their title and inevitably get beaten. In all of the above examples, there is an element of blame, a lack of responsibility and an unwillingness to take ownership for driving their outcome. They are reactive, disappointed with the outcome and fail to see themselves as part of the problem. In other words, they are focussing on the ‘catch’ rather than the ‘throw’.

Solution: A shift in focus

To focus on the throw is to be strategic, to be consistent and to be accountable. To achieve any sort of gains in life be it putting on some muscle in the gym, winning the trust of your team as a leader or increasing your speed and power as a fighter, you need to demonstrate wisdom. That is, the wisdom to know that the work you put in today will be reflected in the result tomorrow. Too often, we get so focussed on the outcome that we forget to put in the work required to get us there. Once again, that’s what I call focussing on the catch, not the throw.  

1)      Today, do yourself a favour, take a moment to write down an outcome you are working toward….it can be anything…just make it specific. It could be a weight loss goal, quitting smoking, skill challenge, sales target, relationship status, or even something like learning how to juggle three balls!

2)      Now identify what you need to do to achieve that outcome (imagine you are observing somebody physically doing what it takes). Make this behavioural rather than a thought or belief. This is about what you can actually do. It can sometimes be tempting to overcommit at this stage so make it simple to start with. Using juggling as an example, it could be throwing a ball from hand-to-hand consistently with a near-perfect trajectory 100 times without dropping it. Alternatively, you could practice throwing the ball for 5mins a day. Both are specific, you can observe them, they contribute to your overarching outcome of being able to juggle three balls and they are achievable.

3)      Managing your dialogue or ‘story’ around what you are working towards is possibly the hardest element to master. You need to control and be deliberate about what you tell yourself (I mean that voice inside your head that is always there either pumping you up or cutting you down). Using the juggling example, if I’m getting frustrated I might look at a set of juggling balls and say to myself “It’s too hard to juggle 3 balls…maybe I’m not coordinated enough for it…I can’t do it”. A better frame would be to say “Juggling is great for my body and mind, by practising a little each day I’m taking steps toward improving myself, testing my discipline and enhancing my skills….this I can control”.

Finally, take a moment to reflect on everything you’ve got going on in your life right now. Take a plain piece of paper and draw a line directly down the middle. For things that you are ‘focussing on the throw’ with, write them down in the left-hand column. For those things that you are ‘focussing on the catch’ with, write them down on the right. Hopefully, you have more things on the left than on the right. If not, you’ve got your list of ‘things’ that you need to take a closer look at.  Interestingly, by adopting an approach of ‘focussing on the throw’, you’ll have more time, be able to relax more and establish confidence and trust in your capability to get things done.

A LITTLE BIT ABOUT ME

I’m fascinated with people, always have been and always will be. From a very early age, I keenly observed people, I was curious about what motivated them, what made them successful and why they made certain choices. This curiosity led me to study Psychology. After graduating with my Master of Organisational Psychology, I worked for Gallup, a global leader in engagement and strengths-based development. I became a strengths-based coach, engagement expert and worked with senior leaders all over the world.

If you’re curious about how I can help you personally or with the leadership of your team/organisation get in touch via my email: joe@joehart.com.au | website: joehart.com.au | Phone: +61425 224 825